**Disclaimer: This post starts out rather gloomy but I promise it ends well. Thank you in advance for contributing to my therapy session.**
So it's Friday.
I need it to be Wednesday. Seriously. I'm leaving to go out of town tomorrow morning and I still have 1 million things to do and not near enough time in which to do them all.
How does that happen? Why is it so hard to find/make the time for what's important? Like folding that basket of laundry that's been sitting in the chair for over a week. Or the dishes that have been sitting there for longer than I care to mention. Or finishing up some projects that came about due to unforeseen events.
Sorry. I didn't intend for this to be a "woe is me" post. I'm glad to be going back to Metro-Atlanta to visit friends and family. It's going to be a whirlwind trip, cramming a TON of visits into just three days. We'll get to hang out with a lot of people we haven't seen since October.
It's kind of weird, you know? We've only been gone for three months. That's nothing, really. Just three months. But it feels like three years. FOREVER. So much has happened; so much has changed and so much has not gone "according to plan". It's a weird kind of existence...as if I'm here but insubstantial.
...and yet I know we're where we are supposed to be at THIS time in our lives.
Intangibility. It is bent on defining me. It's as if I inhabit some strange otherworld between the living and the washed away. Nothing, however, could convince me to throw in the towel, give up or turn back.
Could be that I'm stubborn.
Could be that I'm just foolish enough to believe in huge dreams.
Could be I'm deliriously tired!
All of the above? Yeah. That's about right.
There's a scene in "The Return of the King" where Sam and Frodo are trudging up Mount Doom and they collapse. They've been through so much, far more than they bargained for when they set off on their Grand Adventure. Nothing had worked out as they had planned. They were hit with one hardship after another, one set back after another. As they're sitting there amid the ash and waste of Mordor, Sam looks up and sees a glimpse of a star shining above the smoke and ruin. He tells Frodo that the star gives him comfort, that it reminds him that there are things that are still good far above and beyond the pain and suffering they are currently experiencing. If they remember that there really is good out there that is untouched by the trouble around them, they can remain heartened and encouraged enough to see through to the end of their task.
There is so much wisdom in that.
There really IS beauty out there untouched by our present circumstances. There are things beyond our suffering and pain. Eternal things amid the temporal calamities.
Keep your eyes on the stars, Friends, and remember: even if you can't see them, because the smoke is thick or the clouds are dark, they are still there. Shining. Eternal. Lending their light. And if you look hard enough, and if you gaze upward long enough, there will be a break in the gloom and you'll see them.
Even if just for a moment, you'll see them and you'll be reminded of what you're fighting for.
Keep fighting. Keep moving forward. And by all means, have a WONDERFUL weekend :D